Poetry - May 2010

Now He's Simply Legend

Heading to the Crucible in Sheffield
Every year has its own story
From those there for the first time
To those who get the final glory
But for one man it was a case
Of still being at the top level at 52
Every time he got a chance he took it
And soon he was up six frames to two
He kept going and making vital pots
With the crowd behind the legend
He doubled the brown and kissed the blue
A shot that proved to be the match's end
He beat the world number one fair and square
And all the crowd were cheering him like a friend
As Rob Walker says "He used to be the Nugget
Now he's simply legend."

(Steve Davis - legend. The way he played at this year's World Championship showed just why he's so highly regarded in the game as a legend of snooker.)

I Wanna Drum

I've got my drum kit right now
And have it all set up to go
I load my Guitar Hero game of choice
And soon I'm in full flow
Whether it be a slow ballad
Or a full on thrash speed metal track
I know that if I follow the beat
I can stay right on track
I've never considered myself a drummer
But I might be changing my point of view
As I feel comfortable bashing sticks
With the song lyrics being directed to you
I know I won't be the best
But I know too what I feel happy
And that's what matters who you do something
So now let's see if I can do these three!

(Getting the drum kit for Guitar Hero has certainly whetted the appetite for playing the game a bit more now.)

Everyone Blames Each Other

I watched the Prime Ministerial debate
With interest to see how everyone would do
The first one looked like everyone was nervous
But by the time they got to number two
Everyone was back to their rigid old selves
And playing the game of blame
Slagging off each other to say they would be at risk
And not concentrating on what they'd gain
If they actually told you in detail what they would do
And what their policies would really mean
Then you could make your own mind up
And not rely on the characters on your TV screen.

(I got bored during the second of the Prime Ministerial debates to be honest, it just descended into effortless slagging off instead of saying what they'd do. Looks like the Conservatives might win though...)

I Don't Want No Booking Fee

Every time I book a ticket for a gig
I always try and avoid one thing
That's paying a booking fee that's way too high
Just to see my favourite band sing
The cost of the ticket might be twenty pounds
But then there's the booking fee
And on top of all that you then have
One small addition of a delivery fee
Even if you print the tickets yourself
An act which I find ludicrious
And you can't even get to venues these days
To use their box office - even more ridiculous
I just want to know the price on the ticket
Is the price that I would pay overall
And not face a thirty three percent increase
Due to Ticketmaster's greedy thrall
Those, Seetickets and Ticketline are all the same
Fleecing the customer for fees every time
Thank heavens I can still use the Academy box office
That don't charge you so you have a good time
Why isn't there some sort of regulation
So you can avoid all the rip off cost
And enjoy the music you so want to do
In future, my not going is their loss.

(Booking fees and postage fees of some £3 on top - what a bloody con. I recently got a £12.50 ticket for a gig not in Manchester and had to pay £2.50 booking fee and £2.25 postage, making it £17.25. Therefore it was a 38% increase. What a rip off.)

May Day Haiku

Take part in parade
End up on a field later
It's the Royal May Day.

(Knutsford's Royal May Day is normally pretty good - if you ever get chance, go!)