Poetry - May 2007

Oo! Oo! Fight! Fight!

The playground is amok with noise
All you can see are massed ranks
Veering towards one corner
Where there's two people going at each other
The crowd cheer and mock alike
With their cat call of aggression
Oo! Oo! Fight! Fight! they cry
And all you can see is brutal submission
They grab their uniform and pull so hard
They try to leg sweep each other down
Then they go hard at each other's faces
With the bare fist the weapon of choice
The noise intensifies as the battle continues
But then you hear the teachers' footsteps
Everyone disperses so not to be involved
Leaving the two of them to scrap it out.

(Pretty much every school's had this in their time. Notably even professional footballers do it now. Yes, Manchester City's Joey Barton and Ousmane Dabo, that means you.)

Everyone Still Has Ambitions, Even Me

I may be turning thirty five this month
But there's so much I want to do with my life
I want to travel a lot more and see some culture
I really would love to go to Monaco as well
Walk around the roads that make the F1 track
Basking in the Mediterranean warmth of happiness
Or maybe a winter trip to somewhere like Japan
And be impressed by all the technology there
Maybe even those things closer to home I want to do
Such as go to Wembley to see Man City play there
Although the way my team play at the moment
I might die before that ambition happens
I'd love to do a documentary series for the BBC
And inspire people by the way I write the show
To prove that anyone in the right frame of mind can do it
And that life isn't reserved for just the lucky ones
People even want to still go on Big Brother
I'll leave them to that ambition of course
But it does make me wonder if everyone still has ambitions
Or do they all just fade into hopes and fears.

(I'm feeling introspective, but there is so much I still want to do with my life! If I wanted to write all the things I wanted to achieve, that would be far too much to mention here but some above are the main ones - and I know some of them are at least achievable.)

The Theatre Of Snooker Dreams

It's ten o'clock on an April Saturday morning
The master of ceremonies announces the players
The four come on, the screen goes down
And then all the action begins
The first day of seventeen long days starts here
In the search for the world champion
As snooker comes home to Sheffield
At the Crucible Theatre, Norfolk Street
This time it's different because I'm here
At the theatre of snooker dreams
I'm watching the action and enjoying every moment
Even the slow tactical frames are enthralling
I'm basking in the atmosphere seeing the pressure
That all the players will be under when they're here
And I even saw the first century break
At the theatre of snooker dreams.

(For anyone who's ever watched the World Snooker on the telly and wondered what it's like to be there. Put it this way, if you ever get a chance - go! You will not be disappointed.)

There's Only One Jacqui Oatley

She's broken new and pioneering ground
One Saturday at the football ground
Her passion for football is plain to see
She explains things really clearly
And yet there's so many people who think
That she won't know offside from a kitchen sink
More fool them I say to them all
Why shouldn't she know her stuff on football?
She was an amateur player till injury cut short
And so she followed her passion for her sport
In a different way and took up journalism
So that she could follow her patriotism
And allegiance to the beautiful game
And she's beautiful too, there is no shame
In me saying in true football chant stylee
There's only one Jacqui Oatley!

(Good on Jacqui I say. About time we had a female football commentator who knows their stuff and isn't afraid to show the same levels of passion about the game - and hopefully even less bias towards Man Utd, Chelsea or Liverpool.)


She sells her clothes in Top Shop
There's queues at five in the morning
But her boyfriend's some useless drug addict
Is this the image we're all adorning
As girls flock to the shelves to buy
Her branded products at £60 a throw
We have to wonder if they all want to be waif-like
And be heading towards size zero
I feel some anomosity towards the whole thing
Because it's aimed girls who want style
But they don't want the same life as Kate
Because they'll just be in the drug user pile.

(Simple, but to the point.)